I loved you
with a mother’s heart,
thinking my love could save you,
but I was a fool, slave to your determination,
lost in your control from the start.
Your supremacy has been hacked away,
but you still have the power
to cut me apart.
sweats through your skin,
your skillfully smelted weapons rust,
corroded by a war that you could never win.
You sought cheap freedom from pain
but found yourself in chains,
weakly reaching to steal alms
from scattered compadres and thieves.
Once the lady of deceit
soared through clean veins
bringing laughter and a peaceful relief,
your inner warnings melting on a sticky spoon,
your synapses giggling in denial of disease.
Did you feel that moment
when the switch flicked from want to need?
Did it creep up silently, like age sneaked up on me,
Or did it swipe you like lightening from behind?
Every vow to stay clean
Fades as it encounters your frowzy face.
The lady will not be disobeyed.
What think ye of thine armour now,
my beloved, struggling son?
©Jane Paterson Basil